TThe Diary of a CEO
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23 February 2023

Lucy Hale Opens Up For The First Time About Eating Disorders, Relationships & Addiction

3Frameworks
11Insights

Frameworks in this episode

Insights & moments

The myth-busts, hot takes, explainers, and tools worth keeping.

Myth Buster· 1

Myth Buster43:00

Hale Says Alcohol Was Her Attempted Solution, Not the Root Problem

Hale rejects the idea that her drinking was simply about enjoying parties or lacking willpower. She says alcohol temporarily quieted her mind and helped her escape painful feelings and inadequacy, before leaving her feeling depressed, anxious, lonely, and worthless; these are her reported experiences and causal interpretation.

  • Hale describes binge drinking and blackouts rather than moderate drinking
  • She says alcohol initially felt freeing and made social acceptance seem easier
  • In her account, drinking also released anger and pain she had held in
  • She disputes the idea that being told simply not to drink addressed her experience
  • The host's account of his former business partner is an anecdote, not clinical evidence
  • The conversation does not establish a general cause of alcohol-use disorders

alcohol isn't the problem the problem is this feeling inside of me

Lucy Hale · 49:30

alcohol was the solution you know for a while

Lucy Hale · 49:30
#alcohol#addiction#pain#coping

Explainer· 1

Explainer41:30

The Cost Hale Saw in Her People-Pleasing

Hale describes people-pleasing as doing things that did not feel authentic or that she did not want to do. In her own pattern, those choices built anger and resentment, which she repressed until they emerged through self-destructive and self-sabotaging coping; this is a personal explanation, not a universal clinical mechanism.

  • Hale connects people-pleasing with acting against her preferences
  • She says repeated inauthentic choices produced resentment
  • Repressed anger became part of the pain she tried to escape
  • She now values showing up more honestly
  • The transcript does not establish that everyone who people-pleases follows the same path

you're doing things that aren't authentic

Lucy Hale · 42:00

it builds anger and resentment

Lucy Hale · 42:00
#people-pleasing#resentment#authenticity#coping

Story· 6

Story03:00

When Acting Became Both Hale's Identity and Her Escape

Hale says moving to Los Angeles and working young caused her identity to become closely tied to her career, accomplishments, successes, and failures. Looking back, she also sees acting and constant work as a distraction that could postpone attention to unresolved emotions; this is her interpretation of her own experience.

  • Hale moved to Los Angeles at 15 and began working young
  • She says she once could not answer what kind of person she was
  • Acting let her inhabit other identities before she understood her own
  • She describes productive work as a socially accepted distraction
  • Life after Pretty Little Liars forced more direct self-examination

my identity became what I did for a living

Lucy Hale · 04:00

my job completely was and has been at times a huge Band-Aid

Lucy Hale · 13:30
#identity#acting#work#escape
Story26:30

Hale Connects Her Eating Disorder to Control and Low Self-Worth

Hale describes restrictive eating, compulsive weighing, intense focus on exercise, hair loss, and an inability to think about much beyond food and her body during her teens and early twenties. She says a therapist told her at about 17 that she was anorexic, and she personally links the behavior to control and feeling that she was not enough; the interview provides no current clinical assessment.

  • Hale says the preoccupation disrupted her attention, happiness, and daily life
  • She traces an early escalation to logging exercise for home-school physical education
  • She says restriction and movement became increasingly obsessive
  • A therapist used the term anorexic when Hale was around 17
  • Hale says her current willingness to nourish and rest her body reflects greater self-respect
  • Her account is personal and should not be generalized into a diagnostic test

it was all I thought about from the moment I woke up until I went to bed

Lucy Hale · 28:30

I love myself enough now to nourish my body

Lucy Hale · 31:30
#eating-disorder#self-worth#control#recovery
Story33:30

How Shared Meals Helped Hale Begin Enjoying Food Again

Hale says an Italian boyfriend who loved food encouraged them to go to dinner, and she gradually learned to enjoy eating again. She presents this as her personal path rather than a prescribed treatment, and says the eating disorder later became difficult again after she joined Pretty Little Liars.

  • Hale says the change did not begin through therapy for the eating disorder
  • Regular dinners exposed her to another way of relating to food
  • She describes improvement as gradual across years rather than immediate
  • Symptoms later intensified amid the loss of control she felt around fame
  • The story is not evidence that social meals replace specialist care

I learned to enjoy food again

Lucy Hale · 34:00

each year that went by I started to feel better and better

Lucy Hale · 34:00
#food#recovery#relationships#eating-disorder
Story42:30

Why External Ultimatums Did Not Make Hale Choose Sobriety

Hale says she tried to stop drinking for partners, her mother, her career, and appearance-related reasons without sustaining the change. She dates her current sobriety commitment to January 2, 2022, when she decided she deserved more and needed to try life differently; her account describes her recovery, not medical guidance for others.

  • Hale reports problematic drinking from her first experience at about 14
  • She describes repeated periods of abstinence followed by relapse
  • Friends, family, her manager, and partners had raised concerns or set boundaries
  • She says change held only when she wanted it for herself
  • She described having a little over one year of sobriety at the interview
  • The transcript does not establish a safe treatment plan for other people

you gotta want something for yourself

Lucy Hale · 47:30

I deserve more out of this life

Lucy Hale · 48:00
#sobriety#alcohol#addiction#motivation
Story1:10:30

The End of Pretty Little Liars Forced an Identity Reset

Hale describes the end of an eight-year, all-consuming show as bizarre and frightening because calls, invitations, and attention changed quickly. The decline in external momentum also gave her space to ask who she was outside work and to accept that future acting jobs might be less visible.

  • Hale says the show's level of fame did not feel sustainable
  • She worried about whether people would remember her or hire her again
  • Post-show disappointments helped ground her expectations of a career's ups and downs
  • She came to accept the possibility of doing lower-profile work
  • The transition created room to describe her values and character apart from acting

where do I fit in do will people remember me

Lucy Hale · 1:11:30

who am I outside of my job

Lucy Hale · 1:13:00
#pretty-little-liars#identity#career-transition#fame
Story1:27:00

The Co-Star Hale Still Uses as a Model for Kind Leadership

Hale remembers Privileged lead Joanna Garcia treating everyone on the production with kindness and learning their names. Garcia's conduct became a model for the kind of lead actor and person Hale wanted to be, summarized in Hale's recurring question about what Joanna would do.

  • Garcia was number one on the call sheet for Privileged
  • Hale noticed how she treated people across the production
  • The example shaped Hale's idea of how a lead should behave
  • Hale says she still thinks about Garcia when deciding how to show up
  • The influence came from observed conduct rather than formal instruction

she treated everyone with such kindness and Grace

Lucy Hale · 1:27:30

what would Joanna do

Lucy Hale · 1:28:00
#leadership#kindness#acting#role-models

Q&A· 1

Q&A1:06:00

Hale Reflects on Wanting Love While Fearing Closeness

Hale says she once thought of herself mainly as someone who chased love, but now sees avoidant behavior in how she sometimes reacted when partners became close. She speculates that low self-worth, familiar chaos, and the model of love she saw growing up influenced whom she chose and how she behaved; these are her reflections rather than a professional attachment assessment.

  • Hale takes responsibility for her role in relationships that failed
  • She says some partners had similar issues or gave her someone else to focus on fixing
  • She describes a fear that closeness would expose her and lead to abandonment
  • She says she might end a relationship first to avoid being left
  • She uses attachment language informally and does not report a diagnosis

when people get too close oop they're gonna see me

Lucy Hale · 1:07:30

I'm gonna blow this thing up before they leave me

Lucy Hale · 1:07:30
#relationships#attachment#self-worth#intimacy

Takeaway· 2

Takeaway56:30

Pretty Little Liars Did Not Repair Hale's Self-Worth

Hale says achieving the success and recognition she had wanted did not resolve her internal difficulties. In her account, public scrutiny and feeling out of control intensified body-image distress and low self-worth, even while the show provided major career opportunities.

  • Hale describes Pretty Little Liars as a dream job and career launching pad
  • She also felt pressure from sudden visibility and social media attention
  • External success did not make her feel deserving or secure
  • She says she lacked tools for navigating the experience in a healthy way
  • Her account distinguishes career gratitude from emotional wellbeing

it fixed literally nothing

Lucy Hale · 59:30

I was a kid and I was struggling but I was struggling publicly

Lucy Hale · 1:00:00
#success#self-worth#fame#pretty-little-liars
Takeaway1:08:30

Sobriety Is Hale's First Filter for a Future Relationship

Hale says she now wants a relationship between two people who each have an identity outside the partnership and are willing to grow. She places sobriety first because she believes other parts of her life work better when she protects it, while also saying she is open to love without needing a partner to fill a void.

  • Hale wants a partner who does not need the relationship for identity
  • She values self-awareness, growth, healing, and emotional safety
  • She would like a partner who understands the importance of sobriety in her life
  • She says relationships had previously helped her avoid focusing on herself
  • She describes herself as ready and open rather than desperate

being sober is really important to me and like that's my number one priority

Lucy Hale · 1:09:30

I also am not desperate for it

Lucy Hale · 1:10:00
#relationships#sobriety#identity#boundaries