TThe Diary of a CEO
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26 September 2022

Maisie Williams: The Painful Past Of A Game Of Thrones Star

5Frameworks
13Insights

Frameworks in this episode

Insights & moments

The myth-busts, hot takes, explainers, and tools worth keeping.

Myth Buster· 1

Myth Buster37:30

Being Set for Life at 12 Did Not Make Every Problem Disappear

Williams is careful to distinguish financial hardship from emotional pain. She says money removed problems such as bills and housing insecurity for her, but it did not undo trauma or guarantee happiness; she also stresses that being able to confront a new layer of problems is itself a privileged position.

  • She recognises that she has not had to struggle for rent or employment as an adult
  • She felt guilt about enjoying resources that friends and family did not share
  • Helping others financially did not remove either their pain or hers
  • She explicitly preserves the importance of money for basic security

money won't take the pain away

Maisie Williams · 41:30

it will take like the stacking bills or you know um or the fear of like losing a house

Maisie Williams · 42:00
#money#privilege#trauma#happiness

Story· 9

Story02:00

The School Questions That Finally Exposed What Was Wrong

Williams describes childhood fear and sleeplessness that she did not initially understand as signs that something was wrong. At about eight, a teacher's specific questions about hunger and breakfast opened a route for her to disclose what was happening, after earlier care had not reached the issue.

  • She remembers comparing her dread with other children's apparent joy
  • She says she did not initially recognise the traumatic events as wrong
  • A teacher moved from a broad welfare question to concrete questions about breakfast
  • Williams believes being asked the right questions mattered

a lot of the traumatic things that were happening I didn't realize that they were wrong

Maisie Williams · 02:30

I'd never been asked the right questions where I could really say what was wrong

Maisie Williams · 16:00
#childhood#disclosure#school#trauma
Story25:00

How Acting Gave Real Emotion a Consequence-Free Outlet

Williams says her early experiences gave her access to confusion, pain, and fury that casting directors later saw in her performance. Acting let her feel and release those emotions intensely while the scene remained fictional and no one was actually being harmed.

  • Interviewers asked how she could portray pain at such a young age
  • She privately felt that the emotions were already familiar
  • Performance allowed genuine emotion inside a pretend situation
  • She later felt her story might help others once she could describe more than pain

I get to access all of that confusion and pain in my job

Maisie Williams · 26:00

it's all pretend but like the emotion is is real

Maisie Williams · 26:00
#acting#emotion#expression#game-of-thrones
Story34:30

Fame Asked a Teenager to Define an Identity That Was Still Changing

Williams says early fame created pressure to articulate fixed preferences and opinions before she knew what she thought. Looking back, she wishes she had treated those answers more lightly and allowed herself to change without feeling she had represented herself falsely.

  • Public interviews made ordinary preferences feel like identity commitments
  • She later found that some answers no longer felt true
  • Her advice to her younger self is to accept that today's answer can change tomorrow
  • She compares identity with something fluid rather than final

I really don't know anything about anything I really need to know these things

Maisie Williams · 35:30

whatever you feel that day that's okay and it can change the next day

Maisie Williams · 36:30
#fame#identity#adolescence#change
Story42:30

Leaving Game of Thrones Also Meant Dropping a Rehearsed Persona

Before the series ended, Williams already felt she was performing a public version of herself built around saying the right thing, being liked, and appearing to have life figured out. The show's end and the isolation of the pandemic accelerated her move from asking who she was to considering who she could become.

  • She describes the public persona as a character she had created
  • Being a good role model became entangled with trying to be liked
  • At the height of recognition, her interactions felt rehearsed
  • She experienced the ending as an opening for a more authentic identity

I feel like I'm like cosplaying as this like person I've created

Maisie Williams · 43:00

everything I said and felt and did it was just like oh none of this is

Maisie Williams · 45:00
#game-of-thrones#persona#authenticity#fame
Story1:00:00

Why Williams Pulled Back From Party Drugs and Rarely Drinks

Williams says she took party drugs and partied as a teenager, while resisting the host's stronger framing of substance abuse. She concluded that continuing would obstruct her pursuit of happiness. At the time of the interview, she said she was not sober but did not generally drink at home or on weeknights.

  • She distinguishes her account from the host's initial substance-abuse framing
  • Access to money meant she could have bought more drugs
  • She decided she needed to stop the party-drug pattern
  • Her reported alcohol use was occasional and social rather than complete abstinence

I like party like took a lot of party drugs and like partied when I was like a teenager

Maisie Williams · 1:00:30

I need to stop doing this if I want to like feel happiness

Maisie Williams · 1:01:00
#party-drugs#alcohol#teenage-years
Story1:04:30

The Patient Partner Who Made Self-Sabotage Visible

Williams says she used to leave relationships at the first hint of conflict, interpreting escape as protection even when the other person was kind. Her partner Reuben responded without coercion: he named the pattern, allowed her time, and left the decision with her. That patience helped her see a reaction she had previously missed.

  • Her response to conflict was immediate withdrawal
  • She says the earlier partners had not mistreated her
  • Reuben pointed out the pattern without trying to control her choice
  • The relationship gave her new evidence about peaceful coexistence

whenever there was like any hint of like I don't know conflict I was like I'm out

Maisie Williams · 1:05:30

just observe what is happening right now

Maisie Williams · 1:07:00
#relationships#self-sabotage#conflict#trust
Story1:09:30

Naming Her Core Kindness Revealed the Pain Beneath the Persona

When asked who she is, Williams hesitantly describes herself as kind, sensitive, and considerate. Saying it is painful because it conflicts with the monstrous self-image she says was imposed on her. She contrasts those qualities with a harder projected identity built around speaking her mind and not caring what others think.

  • She finds positive self-description difficult
  • Kindness and sensitivity feel more central than her defensive presentation
  • The contrast raises the question of why she blocks qualities she does not consider bad
  • Both speakers label their explanations in this section as speculation

I'm like a kind and sensitive person

Maisie Williams · 1:09:30

why was I made to like feel like I was such a monster

Maisie Williams · 1:11:00
#identity#kindness#sensitivity#self-image
Story1:28:30

Why Speaking Freely Felt Liberating and Frightening

Near the end of the interview, Williams says the conversation feels freeing but also frightening because it will become public and involves other people. She explains that discussing how art changed her life required acknowledging what expression helped her escape from.

  • She had prepared herself with yoga and breathing exercises
  • The anxiety concerned whether she would be open and honest
  • Media training and the privacy of others pulled against disclosure
  • She hoped the conversation could help people while remaining uncertain about its reception

it's very liberating to speak this freely

Maisie Williams · 1:28:30

I couldn't talk about that and without like fully talking about what it helped me escape from

Maisie Williams · 1:31:30
#vulnerability#public-speaking#privacy#art
Story1:43:00

Running Out of ADHD Medication and Refusing the Blame Spiral

Williams says she had been diagnosed with ADHD about eighteen months earlier and took prescribed medication daily. While working in France, she ran out and could not arrange more in time. Her corrective action was not medical advice; it was to stop punishing herself for the planning mistake and accept that she would have to ride out the immediate difficulty.

  • A psychiatrist who had known her for a long time suggested the assessment
  • The diagnosis and prescription are reported as Williams's personal experience
  • Attempts to have medication sent did not work
  • She interrupted counterfactual self-blame when it could not change the situation

I was diagnosed uh like a year and a half ago with ADHD and I take medication every day

Maisie Williams · 1:43:30

the main thing that I did was like stop beating myself up about like not like organizing it better

Maisie Williams · 1:44:00
#adhd#medication#self-compassion#planning

Q&A· 1

Q&A56:30

What Williams Says Helped Her Feel More Worthy

Asked what had genuinely helped her sense of worth, Williams names meditation and spirituality, which entered her life in 2021. She reports that Transcendental Meditation and personal spiritual experiences changed how alone she felt. This is her personal account, not a general medical claim or treatment recommendation.

  • She says periods of unworthiness still return
  • She identifies meditation and spirituality as personally helpful
  • She specifies Transcendental Meditation rather than drug use
  • She describes ordinary-life spiritual experiences as meaningful to her

meditation and uh spirituality which are two things I didn't have a relationship with for my whole life up until um 2021

Maisie Williams · 58:30

I felt like oh I'm like I'm not alone

Maisie Williams · 59:30
#meditation#spirituality#self-worth

Takeaway· 2

Takeaway27:30

Why the Joy of Performing Outweighed the Risk of Rejection

Despite expecting disappointment, Williams kept auditioning because dancing and performing were among the few times she felt the uninhibited joy she saw in other children. The possible life on the other side of an opportunity made rejection worth risking.

  • She entered the Arya Stark audition expecting not to be what they wanted
  • Dancing and performing made her feel fully human
  • She was willing to leave familiar surroundings for stage school
  • The upside of an opportunity felt larger than what she might lose

the only time that I really felt that joy that I saw in other people was when I was like dancing or performing

Maisie Williams · 31:00

on the other side of this could be absolutely everything

Maisie Williams · 32:00
#auditions#joy#rejection#performance
Takeaway1:25:30

How Pandemic Stillness Made Her Mood Easier to Track

Williams says she had long wanted to understand herself but did not know how to go deeper. During the pandemic, daily variables stopped changing so much, which made shifts in her mood easier to observe. She names Reuben, meditation, therapy, and stillness as contributors rather than claiming a single cure.

  • A more stable environment reduced competing explanations for daily mood changes
  • She could compare her mood across similar days more clearly
  • Multiple supports contributed to the period of self-examination
  • She stresses that choosing to continue must happen repeatedly

a lot of variables like stopped shifting so I could track my mood like more accurately

Maisie Williams · 1:26:30

you have to choose again like am I going to get back on the horse or am I gonna not

Maisie Williams · 1:28:00
#stillness#mood#pandemic#self-awareness