TThe Diary of a CEO
← All frameworks
Finance

Experience-First Spending Rule

Use disposable money to create memories instead of status contests.

Difficulty
Easy
Time to result
~weeks to results
Steps
5
Confidence
96%

Von Hippel distinguishes necessary possessions from discretionary purchases used partly to signal status. He argues that the latter are vulnerable to endless comparison: a new car or object can quickly feel inferior when a more expensive example appears. Experiences work differently because they become part of memory, and shared experiences can also deepen relationships. Apply the rule after essentials and financial constraints are covered. Identify what a proposed purchase is meant to provide, test whether comparison is the main driver, and ask whether an activity could create a stronger memory or connection for the same budget. The framework does not claim that all objects are wasteful. It is a decision rule for choosing between discretionary consumption and experience when both are genuinely affordable.

Origin

Von Hippel contrasts buying a durable couch with spending on a ski day, then explains why his intuition changed after seeing research on experiential spending. Extracted from The Diary of a CEO.

Core principles

  • 01Material status comparisons are difficult to finish.
  • 02Experiences can become durable memories.
  • 03Shared experiences can strengthen connection as well as enjoyment.
  • 04Essential purchases and disposable spending require different tests.

How to run it

  1. 1

    Clear the essentials

    Confirm that the money is genuinely disposable after necessary purchases, commitments, and an appropriate buffer. The rule begins only after basic financial constraints are met.

    Pro tip Classify the purchase honestly as essential, useful, or discretionary.

    Watch out Do not fund an experience with unaffordable debt.

  2. 2

    Name the expected return

    Write what you expect the possession to change: comfort, utility, recognition, excitement, or belonging. This reveals whether the decision is mainly practical or comparative.

    Pro tip Ask whether the benefit would remain if nobody else saw the purchase.

  3. 3

    Generate an experience alternative

    Find one affordable activity that could meet the same emotional aim. Consider learning, travel, sport, a meal, or time with people who matter.

    Pro tip Prefer experiences you would value even without posting about them.

    Watch out An expensive experience can also become status consumption.

  4. 4

    Add connection

    Where appropriate, invite someone whose presence would improve the activity. Shared memory is part of the mechanism Von Hippel proposes.

    Pro tip Choose the companion and activity for mutual enjoyment, not display.

  5. 5

    Review lasting value

    Afterward, assess utility, memory, connection, and the urge for further comparison. Use the evidence to refine later spending choices.

    Pro tip Compare satisfaction after several weeks, not only at purchase time.

In the wild

Couch or ski day

Von Hippel recalls thinking that a couch was sensible because it lasted, while a ski day felt hedonistic because it ended quickly. He now argues that, when the money is genuinely disposable, the activity may contribute more to happiness because it becomes a memory, especially when shared.

The spending decision is evaluated by durable experience and connection, not only physical longevity.

Common mistakes

Applying the rule before essentials

Von Hippel limits the advice to disposable income, not money needed for basic stability.

Calling every possession a status purchase

Objects can provide real utility; the relevant comparison is between genuinely discretionary alternatives.

Turning experiences into display

An activity chosen mainly to outperform others can recreate the same comparison trap.

Is it for you?

Best for

People with disposable income deciding between another status-linked possession and a meaningful activity.

Not ideal for

Essential purchases, debt emergencies, or anyone who lacks a safe financial buffer for discretionary spending.

From the transcript

spending our money on doing things tends to make us much happier

William von Hippel · (1:31:00)

that ski holiday actually becomes part of yourself

William von Hippel · (1:32:00)

From the episode

Behavioural Psychologist: We're Not Having Enough Sex! Fat Makes You Attractive & The Poorer You Are The Friendlier You Are!