Intention-Behavior Alignment Audit
Compare declared goals with the intentions revealed by your calendar
- Difficulty
- Easy
- Time to result
- ~days to results
- Steps
- 6
- Confidence
- 97%
Maté proposes auditing intentions through behavior rather than relying only on sincere declarations. Define what you want in work, health, relationships, family, and inner life. Then classify current activities by whether they support or undermine those aims. The critical move is to inspect how time is actually allocated, because repeated behavior can reveal an unstated intention such as self-importance or external validation. Maté illustrates this with his years as a workaholic doctor: he sincerely said his children's happiness mattered most, while living in a way that prioritized being needed elsewhere. He also adds inner peace to the goal set, arguing that external achievement cannot reliably manufacture it. The audit ends by reducing activities that undermine the full goal set and strengthening those that support it.
Origin
Extracted from The Diary of a CEO
Core principles
- 01Behavior reveals intentions that words can hide
- 02Every activity either supports or undermines a stated aim
- 03Inner peace belongs in the goal set, not outside it
- 04External achievement cannot reliably produce an internal state
How to run it
- 1
Declare the outcomes
Write the work, health, relationship, and family outcomes you sincerely want.
Pro tip Use outcomes specific enough to test against your week.
- 2
Add the inner purpose
Name the internal quality, such as inner peace, from which you want to pursue the external goals.
Pro tip Do not assume the external goals will automatically create this state.
- 3
Map supporting behavior
List the recurring activities and time allocations that directly support each declared outcome.
- 4
Map undermining behavior
List what drains health, weakens relationships, or sacrifices inner peace even when it appears productive.
Pro tip Include habits that deliver praise, status, or temporary relief.
- 5
Infer the enacted intention
Ask what priority an observer would infer from your calendar and repeated choices. Compare that with what you said matters.
Pro tip A discrepancy is information, not a reason for self-attack.
- 6
Reallocate deliberately
Diminish or eliminate activities that undermine the aims and strengthen the ones that support them.
Pro tip Change one recurring commitment first so the audit produces an observable result.
In the wild
Maté says that as a young parent he would sincerely have named his children's happiness as his goal. His life as a workaholic doctor, however, kept him unavailable while rewarding him for being important and needed by others. Looking at behavior rather than the declaration revealed self-importance as the enacted intention.
→ The contradiction between stated family values and daily allocation became visible.
Steven lists service, fulfilling work, health, honest relationships, and a close family as his goals. Maté points out that they are largely external and adds inner peace. That addition changes the test: work that appears to serve others but repeatedly destroys inner peace may still undermine the full set of aims.
→ The goal set gains an internal criterion that external success alone cannot satisfy.
Common mistakes
Auditing words instead of time
Sincere declarations can coexist with contradictory behavior. Use recurring choices and time allocation as evidence.
Making inner peace a reward
Treating peace as a prize that follows enough achievement recreates the external-validation loop the audit is meant to expose.
Is it for you?
Best for
It is best for ambitious people whose work, health, relationships, and inner life compete for time.
Not ideal for
It is not a complete plan for circumstances where basic survival constraints leave little control over time.
From the transcript
“what factors in your life support those goals and what don't.”
“If I want to know your real intentions, I have to look at how you live your life”
“bring the two into alignment.”
From the episode
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