Radical Honesty Emotional Sitting
Stop escaping difficult feelings and learn what they do when you stay
- Difficulty
- Moderate
- Time to result
- ~weeks to results
- Steps
- 5
- Confidence
- 96%
Diego Perez describes radical honesty as a practice between a person and themselves rather than a demand for disclosure to others. After recognizing that refusing to admit he felt bad had supported destructive coping, he stopped covering anxiety, stress, and worthlessness and sat with those feelings instead. The mechanism is exposure with observation: remove the habitual escape, remain present for a short period, notice that the emotional state changes, and separate the feeling from the action it normally triggers. Perez began with a few minutes and gradually extended the time. He presents the method as a personal turning point, not as a substitute for clinical care or a guarantee that every difficult emotion can be handled alone.
Origin
Extracted from The Diary of a CEO
Core principles
- 01Avoidance can hide information about your inner state
- 02A feeling does not have to dictate an action
- 03Emotional intensity can change while it is being observed
- 04Practice can begin with a few minutes
How to run it
- 1
Tell yourself the truth
Acknowledge the feeling you have been minimizing or covering. Describe the current experience without turning it into a verdict about yourself.
Pro tip Use a plain label such as anxiety, stress, sadness, or worthlessness.
Watch out Do not use the exercise to deny the need for professional help.
- 2
Remove the escape
For a bounded period, do not reach for the distraction or coping habit you normally use to suppress the feeling.
Pro tip Start somewhere quiet with the phone out of reach.
Watch out Choose a safe setting and stop if the experience becomes unmanageable.
- 3
Stay and observe
Sit with the emotion for a few minutes. Notice its intensity, bodily sensations, and the actions it urges without automatically following those urges.
Pro tip Begin with a duration you can realistically repeat.
Watch out The goal is observation, not forcing the feeling to disappear.
- 4
Notice impermanence
Watch for changes in the emotional storm. Use the experience to learn that a feeling can be temporary and need not govern the next action.
Watch out One calmer sitting does not prove that every future episode will feel the same.
- 5
Build capacity gradually
Repeat the exercise and lengthen it only as your ability to remain present grows. Reflect on patterns revealed by the practice.
Pro tip Perez progressed from a few minutes to 10 and then 15 minutes.
In the wild
After his drug-related health scare, Perez says he stopped automatically smoking when anxiety, stress, or worthlessness appeared. He sat on his bed with the feelings, first for a few minutes and later for longer periods, and observed that the emotional storms were temporary.
→ He learned from his own experience that the feelings did not always have to overwhelm him or govern his actions.
Common mistakes
Trying to eliminate the emotion
The practice is to observe and tolerate what is present, not to demand immediate relief.
Starting without a safety boundary
A solo reflection exercise should not replace appropriate support when distress is acute or unsafe.
Is it for you?
Best for
People who notice that screens, substances, busyness, or company repeatedly help them avoid their feelings.
Not ideal for
Anyone in acute distress who needs immediate support from a qualified mental-health professional rather than a solo exercise.
From the transcript
“I would challenge myself to stay with the feelings that I used to run away from.”
“They don't even need to govern your actions.”
From the episode
Yung Pueblo: How To Let Go Of The Past, Connect With The Present, & Expand The Future