TThe Diary of a CEO
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Mindset

Thought-Feeling-Action Change Chain

Change the inner picture before asking for a different behaviour

Difficulty
Moderate
Time to result
~weeks to results
Steps
5
Confidence
96%

Qureshi describes behaviour as the end of a sequence: people think, then feel, then act. Telling someone to behave differently starts too late in that chain and may produce only compliance. Instead, identify the words, assumptions, and mental pictures that frame the proposed action. Replace language that triggers resistance with language that invites curiosity, then observe whether the new interpretation creates a different emotional response and a more willing action. His leadership example is to describe a proposed change as an experiment. The method does not claim that wording removes every practical obstacle; it is a way to change the meaning attached to an action before demanding it.

Origin

Extracted from The Diary of a CEO

Core principles

  • 01Thoughts shape feelings
  • 02Feelings influence actions
  • 03Language can alter how change is interpreted
  • 04Commitment is stronger than reluctant compliance

How to run it

  1. 1

    Specify the action

    Define the behaviour you want to see rather than asking vaguely for improvement.

    Pro tip Use an observable action.

  2. 2

    Trace the current frame

    Ask what words, pictures, or assumptions make the current response feel reasonable to the person.

    Watch out Do not assume resistance is merely stubbornness.

  3. 3

    Reframe the meaning

    Use language that creates curiosity or possibility instead of threat. Presenting a reversible trial as an experiment is one option.

    Pro tip Keep the reframe honest about the proposed action.

    Watch out Do not disguise a fixed decision as participation.

  4. 4

    Check the feeling

    Notice whether the new frame changes apprehension, interest, or willingness before pressing for action.

  5. 5

    Run and review

    Try the action and use the result as feedback about whether the frame and the action both need adjustment.

    Pro tip Prefer a bounded first test.

In the wild

Calling a change an experiment

Qureshi advises leaders not to announce only that the team is going to make a change. He suggests inviting the team to try an experiment, language he says can make people more willing to participate.

The proposal is framed as a test rather than an imposed permanent disruption.

Common mistakes

Starting with commands

Repeatedly demanding a new behaviour leaves the beliefs and feelings sustaining the old one untouched.

Using a manipulative reframe

Trust falls if softer language conceals the real stakes or reversibility of the decision.

Is it for you?

Best for

It is best for leaders, coaches, or individuals trying to create willing and durable action.

Not ideal for

It is not ideal when a material barrier, missing skill, or unsafe condition is the real cause of inaction.

From the transcript

we think and then we feel and then we act

Jamil Qureshi · (08:00)

I'd like to try an experiment

Jamil Qureshi · (08:30)

From the episode

World Leading Psychologist: How to Succeed in Life & Work - Jamil Qureshi