TThe Diary of a CEO
← All frameworks
Mindset

Mirror Advisor Self-Talk

Address yourself with the perspective and care you would give another person

Difficulty
Easy
Time to result
~days to results
Steps
4
Confidence
91%

Adesanya describes talking to himself in a mirror as a tool he drew from therapy and experience. His key move is to speak to himself as though he were advising another person. Seeing his reflection helps him humanize himself, while the conversation can include naming the situation, offering encouragement, and building himself up. The method does not require pretending that everything is fine; its mechanism is perspective. By moving from an unexamined inner monologue to deliberate spoken advice, the person can hear a more compassionate and useful response. The exercise is best treated as a self-reflection practice rather than a substitute for therapy or other qualified care, and any encouragement should stay connected to evidence and a realistic next action.

Origin

Extracted from The Diary of a CEO

Core principles

  • 01Distance can make supportive advice easier to access
  • 02A visible reflection can make self-address feel more human
  • 03Useful self-talk can acknowledge difficulty without reinforcing it
  • 04Encouragement should remain grounded in what is true

How to run it

  1. 1

    Face yourself

    Stand or sit where you can see your reflection and pause long enough to notice your current inner commentary.

    Pro tip Start with a brief session so the exercise stays practical.

    Watch out Stop if looking in the mirror is distressing or unsuitable for you.

  2. 2

    State the situation

    Say plainly what happened, what you feel, and what decision or challenge is in front of you.

    Watch out Avoid turning one setback into a fixed judgement about yourself.

  3. 3

    Switch to advisor mode

    Speak as you would to someone you care about who brought you the same problem. Offer honesty, perspective, and grounded encouragement.

    Pro tip Use your own name if that helps create distance.

  4. 4

    Name the next move

    End with one action you can take rather than continuing an abstract motivational speech.

    Pro tip Make the action small enough to begin immediately.

In the wild

A grounded pre-performance reset

Before a difficult presentation, a person notices the thought that they do not belong. In the mirror, they acknowledge the nerves, recall the preparation they completed, speak as they would to a capable friend, and choose to rehearse the opening once more.

The person replaces an automatic judgement with a grounded perspective and a concrete next action.

Common mistakes

Forcing unbelievable praise

Statements that contradict the person's own evidence can feel hollow; the method works better with truthful encouragement and perspective.

Using reflection instead of help

A self-talk exercise does not replace qualified support for persistent or serious distress.

Is it for you?

Best for

People who can advise friends constructively but struggle to speak to themselves with the same perspective.

Not ideal for

Treating significant mental-health symptoms without professional support or forcing positive statements that feel false.

From the transcript

Speaking to yourself like you would to someone you're giving advice to.

Israel Adesanya · (22:00)

When you look in the mirror, you humanize yourself.

Israel Adesanya · (22:00)

From the episode

Israel Adesanya: Becoming World Champion Was The Lowest Day Of My Life